Hi, My name is meg
I was being BULLIED without even knowing.
Let me start off by saying that I have made mistakes. Shocking, I know. I have not always made the best decisions, and they have come with consequences that are sometimes almost too hard to bare. But, I have been blessed with the innate knowledge that forgiveness is possible and attainable. I also know that who you have been does not necessarily define who you are, or who you can become. And because of those things I have been given a whole new life to build on and fight for. I am so proud of who I am, and feel no shame about who I have been because it has shown me how to truly live and love. I have overcome obstacles that many may not understand, and because of those things I am kinder, love more, laugh harder, and am constantly striving to better myself.
Unfortunately, tonight was one of the nights where life slaps you in the face and no matter how hard you try to embrace it, it just really really hurts. I received an email from someone who I care dearly for, and that person made mention that there was an Instagram account that was dedicated to hurting me. You can imagine my shock when I opened the link that the first thing it said under the picture was "girlswhofakecancersukk.com" I sat there with two of my best friends during what had been a really lovely girls night out, and tried to wrap my head around what I was seeing.
Did someone really think that about me?
And enough so that they created an account to go out of their way to hurt and ridicule me?
I felt humiliated. Embarrassed. Shamed. I was a joke to people on a social networking website, which means it is now a permanent fixture on the internet. The followers of the account consisted of strangers, and people I knew both as acquaintances and dear friends. People that I thought considered me a friend were allowing this bullying to happen, and enabled it by following? Its a strange feeling to not really know how you are perceived.
I went back to the email that I had received and this person asked me to take a look at an attachment that went along with the email. Here is what I saw:
To the person(s) who were involved in doing this - I forgive you.
To those of you who came forward and loved me enough to give me the benefit of the doubt - I love you.
And to those of you who are suffering at the hands of someone else - Just know that the love of those around you truly outweighs anything they could say or do. It might feel like your world is ending and that the embarrassment is too much to face, but it gets better. Life doesn't end, you are not a lesser person because of what these cowards have said and done, and you get back on your feet and keep moving forward. The victory is looking beyond what is being done, and forgiving the action.
I am hurting, and it is the last thing I wanted to feel tonight. But I am a fighter and I have not come all this way to let a stranger, and people who do not have my best interest in mind take that from me.
I love my family. I love my life. I love my friends. I love my mistakes. And I love the future that lies ahead.